The 2020 Working Mothers of the Year's Best Advice for Work-Life Balance

Climbing the career ladder while managing a family is no easy task. Who better to ask for advice than the women below, who've been nominated by their companies as a 2020 Working Mother of the Year? In their own words, they share the tips and tricks that help them balance their busy lives.

Our Working Mothers of the Year were nominated by their employers, which have been named a Working Mother 100 Best Company. Read more from our Working Mothers of the Year on their inspiring stories or the best advice they ever received.

Kat Pigman, Quality Assurance Complaint Supervisor, Abbott Nutrition Supply Chain, Abbott

Be intentional with your time, be flexible and know when to ask for help. I've learned that sticking to a schedule and setting clear boundaries allow me to manage my work-life balance more effectively. On the flip side, like many full-time working parents, my husband and I have to continually navigate caring for our son while delivering at work. During quarantine, that has been more difficult, but having a flexible work schedule and allowing ourselves a bit of grace made it less overwhelming. And the support of my family, friends and colleagues gets me through even the most challenging times.

Brenda W Gerald, AbbVie Patient Services, AbbVie

Don’t lose sight of who you are, personally and professionally, during the short time you have your children under your wing at home. Build traditions unique to YOUR family, put them on the calendar and make precious memories. Simple things such as trips to the local strawberry patch and baking shortcake together when you get home, celebrating half birthdays (complete with half a cake, half a gift and half of the birthday song), buying and delivering gifts to seniors in nursing homes for the holidays, annual pumpkin patch trips and pumpkin carving contests—the possibilities are endless. Create joy, and don’t blink.

Jessica Clemons, Senior Manager, Accenture Strategy, Accenture

As working parents, we carry guilt with fantasies that we’ll be there for every moment and milestone with our families. With five active children, that simply isn’t possible, so I have frank conversations with my kids about priorities. There is an art to negotiating and giving them choices, working with them to decide what matters most. They appreciate being involved in decisions, and it helps teach them about prioritization.

Kenyanna Scott Bell, VP Assistant General Counsel, ADP

Embrace the ability to say no. We are allowed to admit that we cannot do it all. It is important to be protective of your time and select priorities that are of most value to you, your family and your work.

Dominique Talbert, Director Scientific Publications, Astellas

As a busy graduate school student and single parent, I quickly discovered the importance of prioritization and the role it plays in happiness and success. Luckily, I've worked for managers that truly support work-life balance as a priority, which has helped me juggle a very hectic career as a scientist with my son's multi-sport schedule.

Natasha Vorspel-Rueter, Head of Business Analysis, AXA XL

How do you make it all work? You don’t. You get better at harmonization, better at integration, better at understanding what drives you and makes you the most productive version of you at work and at home.

Makayla Bradford, Experienced Audit Senior, BDO USA

On Sundays, I carefully schedule the week ahead to ensure I have enough time to spend with my daughter and on myself, using Outlook calendar blocks to map out my days. And throughout the week, I do a daily self-assessment and reflect in my journal to document progress of work/personal tasks and how I am feeling overall.

Emily Kos, Managing Director and Partner, Boston Consulting Group

When I feel overwhelmed, I try to give myself credit for showing up. I focus on doing the things that really matter well, and accepting that ‘good enough’ really is good enough for the rest.

Wendy Smith, Sr. Project Manager, Dow Jones Inc.

When my oldest child was in preschool, there was a Mother’s Day Tea event on a Friday at 4 p.m. I was wrapping up some loose ends at the office, and I was more than a few minutes late to the event. I will never forget my son’s tear-stained face when I arrived—he thought his Mommy wasn’t coming. I was instantly overwhelmed with regret. Now, years later, I have no clue what I was working on that afternoon, and my son has no memory of the event, but I've never forgotten the look on his face. It was a minor parenting foul, but reflecting on it frequently has spared me from missing out on other moments that matter with my family. My best advice is to be present in the moments that matter. You will never regret missing a day of work, but you will regret missing an important moment with your family.

Jessica Gonzalez, Office Tax Partner, Ernst & Young LLP

As a mother, I think it’s important to take care of yourself, because when you do, you are going to be a better employee and a better parent. You need that mental break to step away from the stress, and how you do that may look different for everyone. Personally, one big way I manage stress is through exercise. I am also intentional with blocking time on my calendar for family events (big or small) to help better juggle client work and my personal and family time. People on my teams will tell me that they really appreciate seeing me taking personal and family time seriously—it gives them the permission to prioritize what they need to so they can manage their work and home life. If people don't see leaders practicing flexibility and prioritizing their well-being, then they won’t feel that they have the ability to do that for themselves.

Anna Naydonov, Partner, Finnegan, Henderson, Farabow, Garrett & Dunner, LLP

My mother pioneered practicing patent law in the post-Soviet Russia. She was always very authentic and transparent with me about the challenges and rewards of managing a high-stakes career in a male-dominant environment and raising a family. It is not always going to be easy, there will always be guilt, and if you chase work-balance perfection, you are setting yourself up for a path of exhaustion. But so long as you are authentic about it and your kids know why you are passionate about your work and why what you do actually matters, it inspires them to pursue their own goals.

Christina Underwood, Associate Manager, FINRA

It wasn’t until my oldest child said, “Mommy, you work too much and can never attend my events,” that I realized I needed to find a better work-life balance. Since my son was born, he has been challenged with multiple health issues, and I have always tried to prioritize my family and ensure I was present in their lives. One of my mentors shared this piece of wisdom: Attend as much as you can, because these moments won’t last forever, and ask for help. While it seems a given, this advice has truly guided me through my journey as a working mother.

Rachel Wojtkun, Audit Manager, Grant Thornton

One of my mentors once told me at the end of each day she thinks about what she accomplished that day and what she prioritized. Did she feel good about both of those things? If not, what can she change tomorrow? I find myself using this often. If work needed to be prioritized today, family can be prioritized tomorrow. If I don't feel good about the priority choices I made today, rather than dwell on this, I make a change to fix it for tomorrow.

Giovannie Jean-Baptiste, Medical Director, Horizon Blue Cross Blue Shield of NJ

As a single mother with a long commute, it felt as if I was always running behind. My son was involved in multiple afterschool activities. I was also very involved with his school. I served as class parent for the last five years and always volunteered for many activities. I was either eating on the go or very late in the evenings. It seemed as if we were always on the run. My work demands were increasing with new daily responsibilities. I knew I had to re-evaluate my life and priorities. If I kept up that pace, I would burn out quickly. There was a pivotal moment where I could not attend my son’s rehearsal for his talent show. He was devastated. I decided to work on developing my village. I took a leap and began to realize it’s OK to accept help from others. I realized that it could be as simple as getting help with his homework, or accepting another parent's offer to carpool to the various activities.

Cheryl Camin Murray, Health Care Partner, Katten

As the mother of 4-year-old triplets and a health care attorney during a global pandemic, I’ve learned that multitasking is an art. For me, my calendar is my plan for the day. Meetings with clients to discuss health care transactions and regulatory compliance matters as well as client development presentations and calls with colleagues to discuss the Katten Women’s Leadership Forum events go on the calendar, which helps me make sure my little ones are quiet at certain times since we’re all at home together. However, I also block out time to work on projects or certain tasks so meetings don’t take over all my time during the day. That way, I can be more efficient during the workday and have more time to spend with family in the evening. I’ve found a schedule to be very useful in my personal life, too. I’ll even reserve on my calendar time for Peloton workouts, virtual happy hours, and family time whether it’s pizza and game night, an after-work bike ride, date night or FaceTime calls with my extended family. Because if it’s on the calendar, then it holds me more accountable, and I’ll do it.

Balika Sonthalia, Partner, Kearney

As a working mom, I found success in three things: First, I blur the lines between my actions as a professional and as a mother—which is quite contrary to the advice we often get about drawing a line. Second, I have a village that includes people who I can give an SOS call to for anything, from parenting to consulting. And third, I work on having a resilient mindset because I know there will be days when the only way to recover from a fall is to rise again and keep going. By not creating hard boundaries, I find it easier to switch between roles instantly, my village allows me to seamlessly transition back and forth and the resilient attitude helps me get through tough times.

Amanda Clark, WW Strategic Metrics Manager, Lexmark International

Find your voice. If you need help, ask‚ whether at home or at work. Back in early 2011, I had two immune-compromised 4-month olds, and I was unsure how we were going to handle work and life. I started thinking about an alternative work schedule so my husband and I could swap kid duty. I prepped my case and asked if I could work from 5 a.m. to 2 p.m. Lexmark was in complete support. I was able to successfully work these hours for three years and over two jobs.

Stacey Haas, Partner, McKinsey & Company

Before my first daughter was born, I felt like I had the time to say yes to everything—particularly at work—and I was rewarded for doing so. Over time, there became too many things to say yes to, and while I tried, I couldn’t manage them all. I was tired and feeling only partially successful. My children were crying every time I walked out the door. So, I reset. I decided to be much more purposeful with my time. I drew a picture of what I wanted my life (career, family, personal) to look like in three years and pinned it by my desk. This picture has become my guidepost. When an opportunity arises, I always pause and reflect on whether saying YES to it will keep me in alignment with my goals. I also think about whether there is someone else who would benefit more from the opportunity. I don’t always get the choices right, and sometimes my gut wrenches at saying, no, thank you. But I am happier, our family is happier and my impact at work is actually greater.

Shaunte Kinch, Director, Moss Adams

I have always been strongly independent. Motherhood has taught me to get comfortable seeking help. When I was pregnant with my first child, my job at the time required travel, so I asked our human resources department if the company would reimburse the expense of overnighting breastmilk home when I was on the road. Not only did they agree‚ they established a benefit package that included breastmilk shipping. During my second pregnancy, I negotiated a new role that wouldn’t require travel. I am now working on redesigning our services, including innovative ways to provide them remotely. This in turn will allow all my peers to spend less time on the road and more time at home with their families.

Amanda G. Halter, Partner, Pillsbury Winthrop Shaw Pittman LLP

As soon as you can, include your children in the household enterprise, in as many ways as possible—food preparation, laundry, taking out the recycling and garbage, cleaning, feeding the pets, etc. When there are never enough hours in the day, the natural inclination is for the grownups to just handle the domestic front and leave the kids out of it because they slow things down. But, if the children are not involved in these activities, the family is missing out on opportunities to hang out together. I find that if I primarily conceive of quality time with my children as time spent doing activities or on leisure, then on work days when there is a shortage of time for such things, which is most days‚ the tension between paid work and parenting becomes more acute. When we are in it together, we have fun with the mundane. It does mean that some dishes are going to get broken, some dinners will be a disaster (we always keep cereal and canned soup on hand), some clothes are going to get shrunk, some bedtimes will be too late, some homework will be left undone and some extracurricular practices will be missed. So what? Especially now, when school, kid activities, and social gatherings are all canceled, I am more grateful than ever for the shared feeling that our family is in it together.

Angelica Valenza, Vice President, Chief of Staff, Prudential Advisors, Prudential Financial

A manager once told me that it takes a village to raise a family. I now realize she was advising me to ask for help from others, both at home and at work—to be vulnerable. This was hard for me initially, and honestly, I still struggle to say no to a work project or personal commitment—worried that the person asking may think less of me. Of course, what I am forgetting in that moment is that I am not my to-do list—that’s not what people see when they see me. Today, I hope they see someone who is transparent and honest. I have learned that it is OK to show my emotions and share my opinions‚ even if it is uncomfortable at times. Through vulnerability I have also learned to be kinder to myself and place a higher value on my self-worth.

Ashley Connors, Assurance Manager, RSM US LLP

Early in my working mother journey, a mentor gave me incredible advice: You can’t be the best mom, wife, daughter, friend and employee all at the same time. Understanding that there are times when work will be my focus, and other times my family will be my priority, has helped me alleviate, or at least lessen, my working parent guilt. I try to achieve work-life balance on a more macro level and look at my year as a whole.

Cynthia Qualls, Director, Client & Business Services‚ Nuveen, TIAA

Work doesn’t have to get done in the traditional 9 to 5; be flexible and find a company that embraces the non-traditional workday. Some days I take my son to basketball practice at 3 p.m., help with homework, and then log on after bedtime and work until 1 a.m. Other days I begin my workday at 6 a.m. to get my daughter to her appointment at 4 p.m. My days are very full, but so is my heart.