From feeling bad for being a working mom or stay-at-home mom to feeling bad for having a nanny, there are many forms of guilt mothers experience every day, and only child guilt, though it's not discussed as often, happens to be one of them. It's what some moms feel when, for whatever reason, they reveal that they have just one child, as opposed to two or three or more. Since their kids don't have any siblings, these moms worry that they're socially depriving them somehow. And like many forms of mom guilt, it doesn't seem to make much sense, because it shouldn't be anyone's business how many kids we choose to have, and aren't we beyond the stereotype that only children are lonely? (There's been so much research to debunk the only child myths that keep floating around.)
One mom of an only child who doesn't seem to be feeling any of this only child guilt: actress Lisa Kudrow, a.k.a. Phoebe Buffay, one of the most hilarious characters on Friends.
Pheebs, I mean, Lisa, recently spoke with The MOMS Denise Albert and Melissa Gerstein in a video of a Q&A called A Minute with the MOMS, where she responded, in character, to some fun questions about family. When asked which one of her past co-stars she would choose as a dad—Ross, Chandler or Joey—she responded, "What!? Abstain!" She also shared a few other things about being a parent, saying that her favorite activity to do with her son, 18-year-old Julian Murray Stern, is watch Arrested Development and that there are many things she did as a parent that she wish she could change—not just one, as the MOMS had initially asked her about.
As reported by the New York Post, Lisa also told the MOMS that not having another kid was a gift for her son Julian. “[He] made it clear from the moment he could speak that he didn’t want a brother or sister ... [and] it just worked out that way anyway—but to this day, he’ll say, ‘Thank you,'” she said.
Now that's certainly an interesting take on being the mom of an only child and being an only child! With some moms feeling the guilt for stopping at one, Lisa offers a really fresh perspective—that it can actually be a gift to your kid, and it's not hard to see why. Aside from economic reasons, when you have just one, you won't have to worry about making sure your other kids are getting equal attention from you or having to hide who your favorite child is. So for all the moms out there who have just one child and want to keep it that way: keep doing you.