We have a Secret Santa tradition at our holiday bash, and my boss is really into it. This year, I drew his name—but I can’t go! It’s the same night as our family Hanukkah party which I have to attend. The boss won’t be happy if I’m not there to reveal my identity (and give him the final gift). How do I get out of this?

Okay, I don’t usually go in for subterfuge, but in cases of juvenile supervisors with screwed-up priorities, I suggest this: Trade with a co-worker. Yes, you are revealing your Secret Santa identity to someone (blasphemy!), and vice versa, but this may be your only alternative. If you approach your boss with the pickle you’re in, he might not only resent your pallid enthusiasm for the event he so prizes, he might also double-dock you for blowing your cover as his SS! I say seek out the person who has a normal, adult-level fervor for the tradition and make a backroom deal. If that fails, you could try asking for the night off and leave a witty/generous/thoughtful gift in your stead, along with a nice note saying how sorry you are not to be there in person and how you’ll really miss seeing the boss in his Santa suit. And remember to beg him for pictures afterward.