“There’s a word for someone who has two kids in two years,” comedian Sunda Croonquist quips.
“Suicidal.”
This working mom tells jokes like it’s her job…probably because it is! Mother to Aviva Joy, 7, and Tovah Alyza, 5, Sunda splits her time between her family and the stage—she has been a stand-up comedian for 15 years, and is currently the host of “All Star Comedy” at the world-famous Laugh Factory in Hollywood. Sunda has appeared on HBO’s “Chris Rock Show,” Comedy Central’s “Premium Blend” and “Tough Crowd,” and she was even named Nickelodeon’s “Funniest Mom in America!” She’s the producer of one of the longest running female comedy shows in New York, performs regularly at comedy clubs in the Big Apple, and recently appeared on “Law & Order: Criminal Intent” and was a commentator on VH1.
So, when she finds clumps of jello at the bottom of her new Louis Vuitton, wakes up in the middle of the night to the sounds of her daughters’ Wiggles dolls, or when her agent calls her wondering why he just received a case with a Dora The Explorer DVD inside, she just has to laugh.
“I decided to go into this business because comedy is who I am, and it took time to finally come to terms with the fact that it's OK to be funny.....especially when you're making money at it!” she says.
The mother-of-two admits, however, that the late night performance hours are often challenging. “Being a comic is crazy…you’re always exhausted from the night before—I’m a mom, but I also have to please my audience.” It's particularly challenging for women, she says, because it’s a competitive, demanding business, and it’s easy to get swept up in ‘showbiz’ and forget what’s truly important.
"My world is one of depression and Disney,” she says. “Comedians are always so nuts…thank god I have my kids to balance out my life!”
Sunda’s husband, Mark Zafrin, is an attorney who specializes in healthcare law and real estate, and his personality couldn’t be more different than her own—though she says he’s still her biggest fan! “To see my kids cracking up is always a huge high for me,” Sunda says. “We have to laugh....we have an attorney in the house!”
Always the class clown Sunda never once thought she’d be a comedian. Though she grew up on the stage, she did so posing in beauty pageants…not telling jokes. Everything changed when she happened to run into comedian Jackie Mason at a party. “He asked me if I was a comedian, and I just said ‘get outta here!’” she recalls. “I thought he was making fun.”
But he wasn’t. Mason insisted that she was really funny, and that she should try her hand at stand-up comedy. With her husband’s encouragement, Sunda enrolled in a workshop and then hit the stage, debuting at a small club in New York City called "Don't Tell Mama” (how appropriate!) just a few weeks later.
It was then that Sunda began to fight her way into what is still, she says, “a boy’s club.” A huge fan of Jerry Lewis movies, she was thrilled to audition to perform with him for a Henny Youngman tribute. Sunda was the only woman called in for the job, and figured she didn’t stand a chance—she was up against Wayne Brady! When Lewis himself told her she was “one funny lady,” she figured he was just being polite.
“Imagine my surprise when I found out that I beat out all the men for the part, and performed with this legendary entertainer on national television in his annual Labor Day Telethon!” she enthuses. “It was in the early part of my career, but it was then that I recognized success…because I beat the boys at their own game!”
Though she loves nothing more than being up on stage and making people laugh, Sunda’s top priority is still her little girls. While she does have a few regular babysitters that she relies on in a pinch, she’s unlike many of the moms she knows in Beverly Hills because she has no live-in nanny. “I’m definitely hands-on, and I do everything myself. I’m the mom,” she insists. Her daughters are never late for school (show business makes her crazy about being on time!), and she’s involved in their school’s PTA. Sunda wakes up early to get them out the door each day, and she then takes advantage of those precious child-free hours that every working mom covets to do voiceovers, go on auditions, or write new material.
But that’s not the only difference between Sunda and the stereotypical Los Angeles mom. She says she still can’t get over the differences between her life growing up in Paterson, New Jersey, and her home in Beverly Hills.
“I'm always getting a phone call from Aviva’s school with the complaint that she is once again doing cartwheels at recess...which is not allowed!” Sunda says. “Sometimes I have to laugh at the calls because, where I'm from, when you get a phone call from school....usually the kid is packing heat!”
Another challenge is Sunda’s need to be bicoastal for the sake of her career. While the girls attend school in California, she takes them to live with her in New York’s East Village for the summer so she can be closer to the heart of the comedy scene. Her husband makes the commute back and forth to be with his family on weekends.
"It's a strain on him, but it's certainly true that absence makes the heart grow fonder. When he's here, he spends quality time with us," she explains. “People don’t think it’s good for the children to go without seeing their father, but there are kids who live with their fathers year round and never see them. On the weekends, he gives us his all." They all take family vacations together, too, to “maintain some stability”—with Disneyland being a personal favorite!
Much of Sunda’s comedy routine revolves around her “blended” family background. Her father was Swedish and her mother African-American. “When you’re a Swedish and Black Jew, growing up looking like a Puerto Rican, and your mother gives you a Hindu name and sends you to an Irish Catholic School….you’re bound to be funny!” she laughs. She’s currently writing a cookbook for racially-mixed couples, inspired by her own culinary exploits. She prepares Shabbat dinners every Friday, cooking what she calls “Kosher Soul Food”—like collard greens and pastrami.
Her husband is Spanish and Jewish (“he walks around going ‘oy vey, como va!’ she jokes), so one of her daughters ended up looking like the typical “All-American” girl, while the other looks completely different.
“Neither of them look like they belong to me—I’ve had to explain to people many times that I’m the mammy, not the nanny!” Sunda says. She was once called to the school by the nurse's office to pick up Aviva, and when she walked in, the nurse told Sunda that she was waiting for Aviva’s mom. “I really thought she was joking when she said this, but she was serious as a judge,” Sunda explains. “So, I told her I was her mother, but she insisted that she had just spoken to ‘the mother’ and that, in fact, she was en route to the school to pick her up!” Finally, Sunda had to get the admissions director's assistant to confirm that she was, indeed, Aviva’s mom. “You can't make this stuff up!” she laughs.
Aviva is Sunda’s free-spirited child—always the crowd pleaser, extremely competitive, and loves to be the center of attention. Tovah is wise beyond her years and other children gravitate towards her comforting nature. She has always had a voracious appetite for books, thought she isn’t even in kindergarten yet! Aviva insists she’d like to become a veterinarian (“I guess she'll do check-ups in between her cartwheels,” Sunda says) and Tovah wants to be a pediatrician…though she'll have to get over her fear of shots first! They both take after their mom when it comes to a love of the spotlight; both girls are into gymnastics and dancing.
Sunda doesn’t necessarily want them to get into “the business,” but Aviva and Tovah have already been featured on shows like Dr. 90210, in commercials, and on televised interviews for gymnastic invitationals. They’ve even been handpicked for various television performances. And, no, they don’t have an agent or a manager. “I’m just trying to get them through second grade and kindergarten!” Sunda says.
Sunda always looked to her own mother, Sandra, for the same support and guidance she now provides her little girls. Her mom was in many ways the typical pushy “pageant mom,” but Sunda is grateful for all of the dance, voice, and acting lessons because they got her up on stage and made her comfortable speaking in front of people.
Her biggest hardship to date was losing her mom to breast cancer; her father passed away three months later. At the time, she was taping “Second Verdict,” a show that allowed her to use her humor as well as her expertise in criminal justice (she earned a BA in that very subject from Seton Hall University in South Orange, New Jersey). “My mother wanted me to continue working and not miss any tapings because of her sickness, but it was hard to be funny watching her wither before me…losing her hair, nails, and weight,” she says. Her mom is also a recurring character in her stand-up comedy routine (her mother-in-law is, too, but for different reasons!), and having to tell funny stories about her brought Sunda close to tears on stage many nights. “She gave me the strength that has allowed me to continue being successful in my career,” she says.
Though it all, Sunda tries to instill honesty and charity in her children, along with acceptance for people of all races. “Being what they are, and who they are, they better get used to people who are different!” she says. Every year, the owner of The Laugh Factory gives away hundreds of dinners to the poor, and both Aviva and Tovah help prepare the plates and distribute the meals. “They love it, and I love seeing people’s faces when they are served and treated with respect by my little ones,” Sunda says.
The girls have taught their mom a thing or two about kindness, tolerance, and acceptance of others, as well. One of her daughter’s playmates—a child who is clearly not used to “playing nice”—hit Aviva in the eye and broke Tovah’s favorite toy. Sunda assured her kids that the little girl would never come over again, and Tovah’s response was: “Don't say that Mama, she just doesn't know nice people or have nice things...you should give her another chance and she might be better next time." Sunda was moved; though she insists she still isn’t inviting that “little animal” back to her house again.
Thrown from the projects of Paterson where she was surrounded by drugs and murder, and into the posh, upscale lifestyle of Beverly Hills, Sunda prides herself on remaining true to who she is in both of her very different worlds.
“I see all these billionaires in L.A., but I come from a completely different world where money means nothing because it’s all about what’s in your heart,” she explains. “All the money in the world couldn’t save my mother…you just gotta live your life right.”
As far as the day-to-day life of this working mom, Sunda insists that remaining organized and fighting clutter are the keys to success, and that as long as working moms can keep up with their home life, then all the pieces of their career will ultimately fall into place.
“Comedy is my career,” she says, “but my kids are my life.”
Want to catch Sunda in action or learn more about this hilarious working mom? Check her out at www.sundalive.com.
