During the summer, my family spent time at my in-laws in the Hampton.  My in-laws have a house on the beach and it is beautiful....stifling hot, but beautiful.   And it is not easy to stay on a budget in this place.  And I will say I was good until the very last weekend.  I not only fell off the, but the wagon ran me over, and then backed up over on me.

I thought I owed it to my in-laws to take them out for dinner for watching my daughter for the month (more like holding hostage....well, hostage may be a little harsh....my mother in law teared up as I tried to take her home the previous weekend....ah guilt).  She was having a great time and they loved spending the time together.  Far be it for the mother to want to take her child home and see her for a whole 2 hours a day....but I am always being selfish.  Anyway, I found this very cute place and we had a wonderful dinner.  And then it happened...the bill came....and wow....haven't seen that kind of total in a long time.  My first impulse was to throw myself from the tallest building, but at the beach that's like two stories - I'd be lucky to break a leg.  So I handed over the card and smiled and thought to myself it's OK.....we don't do this often anymore, so once in a while, for a very good reason, which it was, we can do it.  Of course, I may have neglected to mention the blouse I bought in the afternoon or the dolphin earrings I bought for the baby (everyone needs dolphin earrings...I mean really).

So when the weekend was over, I had spent more in two days than we have spent in the last two months.  But, after having vomited and cried over the copy of the check, I found a silver lining.  If this was about a year and a 1/2 ago, I would not have even felt a twinge of guilt over the non-essential purchases or the dinner bill that could feed a 3rd world country for a week.  So this guilt is great.  It means I am becoming more responsible, and ensuring that my decisions are made with thought and care.  OK, I did not need the really pretty, very sheer white blouse that hung just right.....no I did not, but I know I didn't, and that's more than I would have thought about before. 

I think as a working mom, we need to give ourselves a break every now and then, and not beat ourselves up for the tiny (cough..huge...cough) slip ups.  I slipped, and from the looks of the charges, I had a really good time.  Back on the wagon I go....in my really pretty white shirt (at least I will look good on the back of the it).