If Mom has a problem, kids often have a problem, too. “When moms drink or use drugs, it can have a big impact on children, greater than when dads drink,” says E. Mark Cummings, PhD, professor of psychology at the University of Notre Dame. “Mothers are usually more involved in kids’ lives, so their drinking causes bigger family adjustment problems.”

Security is undermined
Parents who drink are more inclined to fight. This is what’s most upsetting to kids, who worry their parents may break up and their own life may fall apart. This lack of stability can lead to depression.

Kids feel frightened
Mothers who drink or use drugs are prone to mood swings and unpredictable behavior. They’re more likely to become angry. They’re more inclined to be punitive toward their kids than women who don’t have substance-abuse problems, according to a University at Buffalo School of Social Work study. This can keep kids off balance, confused and scared.

Life can be dangerous
Drinkers, often in denial, are more likely than nondrinkers to get into car accidents.

Kids of drinkers are more likely to drink
“Drinking problems run in families,” says Dr. Cummings, adding that the research isn’t clear on whether this is primarily due to genetics, watching parents drink or both. And if a mom is drinking, she’s far less likely to be on guard about her child’s vulnerability toward alcohol and to warn about risks.