Carol Evans: I’m so glad that we have this chance to talk, and I know the readers of Working Mother magazine are going to be thrilled that you could do this interview for our Mother’s Day issue.

Hillary Clinton: I have always appreciated what Working Mother represents and how useful it is—when I was a working mother I used to read it!

C: That’s wonderful! I’m sure you were thinking about those days when you were planning your daughter Chelsea’s wedding and also being the secretary of state. That must have been quite a challenge.

H: Carol, it was both challenging and incredibly satisfying because thanks to modern technology I could view table linens or menus from afar and stay in constant touch with my daughter. When I was home I tried to make as much time as possible to go to New York and to work on all the aspects of the wedding, which was so different from my very simple wedding, but which gave me and my 91-year-old mother a real thrill. It really was a near-perfect day in every way.

C: Working mothers have a tremendous need for the skills that you have: crisis management, resilience. How do you remain calm in world crises?

H: Well, I’ve had—for better or worse—a lot of practice over many years now, and I have learned over time that you just have to be as focused as possible on the business at hand even if it’s difficult to check your emotions. So much of what I deal with affects the lives of so many people around the world and here at home. I think it’s something that comes with exposure and experience, but it is still very hard. There are so many different circumstances that I find myself in where I deeply either oppose or regret the decisions that are being made by other countries or other decision makers. It rarely helps to be upset. That’s not a useful problem-solving technique. It doesn’t hurt sometimes to show displeasure or a touch of emotion or passion, but within a larger framework of trying to work through to some better outcome.

C: So you’re really keeping the outcome ahead of you at all times?

H: In so many of the situations I find myself, there is no right or wrong, black or white easy answer. If there were, we wouldn’t be where we end up. And therefore I’m always trying to put myself in the shoes of the people with whom I’m dealing so that I can try to see what’s happening from their perspective; I try to empathize where possible. With some of the leaders I deal with, it is very hard to empathize because you just think, Come on. End the corruption, end the killing, start providing a better set of circumstances for your people, quit discriminating against women, feed your children. There are so many matters that are of great consequence to me that are just not of concern to some of the people that I work with. So I am sometimes trying to empathize with someone that I do not have anything in common with, whose values I reject, to try to find some common thread that will enable me to get through to this person. When I go to countries of authoritarian leaders and I push them to release political prisoners who have been picked up for expressing an opinion or for blogging—just everyday common occurrences here in our country—they look at me like I’m asking them to release mass murderers. It’s a constantly difficult balancing act.

C: We were in Beijing, China, in November as part of our series of Global Advancement of Women conferences. The Chinese women were fascinating—ambitious about their careers and worried about work life balance. How much influence do you think the women of China will have around the world as China continues its rapid progress?

H: First, I think it’s very smart of you to take Working Mother across the world, and particularly to China. I believe that Chinese women will play an increasing role in the life of their own society and in the global economy. We have a women’s dialogue as part of our strategic and economic dialogue with China, and we are going to be following through on that. That effort is led by our first-ever ambassador for global women’s issues, Melanne Verveer. So we’re really focused on that.

As you have discovered, there are a great many extremely well educated, ambitious, effective women who are already making a mark in China. Like women everywhere, Carol, they face so many of the same issues that we face. I’ve always believed that reaching across national boundaries as women is important because there are ways to make connections. I think that you have hit upon one of the best, which is to relate to the challenges of women in China who are now balancing family and work in a modern workforce. Of course, women in China, like women in America, have always worked; they’ve worked in fields, in factories, in their homes and their communities, but the pace and stress of the modern economy and the challenge of providing a good work life balance, particularly when it comes to parenting, is a common issue of conversation around the world, I have found.

C: I was very impressed that you extended domestic partnership benefits to LGBT employees at the State Department. You took such a leadership position in the administration. And of course there’s the unexpected repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell. Do you think that’s going to have a big impact on the military, or do you think it’s going to take a long time to filter in?

H: I think it will take a long time to be fully integrated into the day-to-day lives and operations of the military, but I think it’s a really big deal, and I was very proud that it passed on a bipartisan vote toward the end of the year last year. I have a lot of confidence in the current leadership of the military in figuring out the best way to implement it because it is a significant change, and change—no matter where it comes from or what it’s about—is often challenging. It’s just going to have to be carefully but persistently implemented.

C: We will soon be hosting our second annual Advancement Conference for Women in National Security Careers. Women from the CIA and the FBI and private-sector women who have high security clearance will attend. The women at last year’s conference were very dedicated and proud of their work, and living lives quite different from the average woman. At the best of our 100 Best Companies, we’re finding initiatives that ensure that women can succeed in “extreme” jobs like these. Do you have a perspective on supporting women in these kinds of high-stakes careers?

H: I’m very committed to enhancing and increasing opportunities for women across the employment environment. But I’m conscious of how difficult it still is for women in these high-stress, high-visibility positions—whether it’s in the public or the private sector. I think all of us who have children recognize that it does make it more challenging, and that every one of us lives with a certain amount of guilt and concern about doing right by our family. Sometimes you just don’t want to make those trade-offs until your children are grown.

C: Changing that is what Working Mother continues to press for. Looking back, how did you handle it?

H: I’m not sure that I ever could have or would have run for the Senate, or for president, or had the job I currently have when my daughter was young. I think I would have been so conflicted and torn apart every trip I made, every weekend I missed. But I was lucky that I always worked; I always had that balance. I have had a lot of wonderful jobs. But my public career really came after Chelsea was grown.

C: With the leadership you’re bringing to the State Department, we hope that will change. We’re so grateful for the work you did on the Family Medical Leave Act back in 1992–93. But here we are 18 years later, one of only three countries in the world who still don’t have mandated paid maternity leave. It seems odd that we’re so far behind the rest of the world. We just celebrated the twenty-fifth anniversary of the Working Mother100 Best Companies, and now all the companies on our list have paid maternity leave. But they are way ahead of the rest—only 17 percent of companies in the U.S. offer paid maternity leave. Do you feel that this is a good time to really work on this issue, or do you think that this is just going to take decades to change?

H: I think it is something that you have to work on no matter how long it’s going to take. We have a volatile political system, and we have to be conscious of that, but this is a fundamental work family balance issue, and I think the drums should keep beating no matter how unlikely a political change would be. The more you get companies to do it, the more people then are covered. That in itself is a step forward, and then we can build a strong coalition for eventual change.

C: Secretary Clinton, thank you so much. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate your time and your words of wisdom.

H: Oh, Carol, it was so wonderful talking to you.

C: You’ll see this in our Mother’s Day issue, so I’ll wish our readers a Happy Mother’s Day from you.

H: Please do!

Editor's Note: This interview was conducted in late January, 2011, before the crisis in Egypt and the Middle East.