A cohort of kids in your bed often equals less sleep for all, but once you start co-sleeping, it’s hard to kick the habit. Whether it started because your child was afraid of monsters or you wanted to make up for limited quality time, you may want to send your brood back to bed—their own. “A common time to wean kids out of the family bed is before kindergarten begins, when they need to start a school schedule,” says Valerie Levine, PhD, author of Break the Co-sleeping Habit.

Once you opt for separate sleeping spaces, make sure your child has ways to comfort herself without you, like a favorite blanket, a teddy bear or a night-light. try to prevent getting-up excuses at night—by leaving a glass of water on the night table, for example. If she still sneaks into your room, take her right back, give her a pat and leave. “If she gets a cookie or hugs after leaving her bed, why wouldn’t she keep doing it?” asks Dr. Levine.

This can be a tough process, but remember that your child will gain empowering sleep and self-soothing skills. And you’ll get back adult alone time. Sweet dreams!