Sunday morning, 8:00 a.m.: I realize that I forgot to turn on the out of office message on my work email.  I would be going to the California Women’s Conference on Monday, a truly empowering and inspirational day for women of all ages from all walks of life.  I have attended the conference every year for the past 5 years and watched it grow to 10,000+ women to become the largest conference for women in the country. Maria Shriver, First Lady of California, is the host and driving force behind the conference. Everyone I talked to is abuzz about what will happen to the conference after this, Schwarznegger's last year in office.  I digress. 

In my Inbox was an email with the subject line “Inspired.”  It was from a woman in Boston who reads my blogs.  They inspired her, she said.  She and I have a lot in common - we both have two children and hold similar positions at a university.  She said that she often thought about taking a “lower level” job that was less stressful.  I’ve often thought the same thing.  What if... I had less responsibility, less stress?  What if I wasn’t compelled to check email on evenings and weekends, I didn’t have so much on my plate? It doesn’t take long for me to dismiss such thoughts. Like many women my age, I started working right after college to pay the bills with the hopes of carving out a career. We’ve paid our dues, worked hard, and if we’re lucky, somewhere along the way we discovered our passion and forged a career.  At a certain age or a certain stage in one’s career, I’m not sure which, we arrive at a time of reflection, a time to ponder one’s career future: will I ramp up my career further, stay where I am (because I’m good at it), or can I afford to take a step back? I can’t fathom a ‘step back’ partly because I’ve worked too hard to get where I am, but also because I don’t think women should have to. 

On days when I’ve been fortunate enough to be able to leave work early to attend my daughter’s basketball game, I've noticed that I am less tired and less stressed by dinner time.  I fantasize about a part-time job.  I've read plenty of articles about flex-time and telecommuting. Working Mother magazine publishes many an article about family-friendly companies that offer flexible scheduling, job sharing, etc.  With women comprising a majority of the workforce and more than 70% of mothers with school age children in the work force, it still holds true that many companies don’t offer such family-friendly benefits. In some organizations, the benefits apply to upper management, but not all employees.  States have labor laws that distinguish between hourly and salaried employees, but it very quickly becomes a morale issue.   One of the most important roles of anyone in a leadership position is serving as a role model.  I’ve seen bosses who take advantage of their roles and it creates resentment or at the very least an ‘us vs. them’ mentality. Employees notice if you stroll in late or leave early, even though they may know that you work evenings and weekends from home.  It often comes down to ‘face time.’

Many working women fantasize about putting in less face time in order to more fully participate in family time.  Let’s face it - contrary to the belief of new mothers everywhere, children need more of our time and attention as they get older.  Infancy is the easy part!  I'm no different. While I couldn’t fathom taking a ‘step down’ in order to have more time for my family, I started to think about alternatives that satisfied my need to be productive, engaged, and fully employed.  I encourage other working mothers to do the same.  We work in an age when it’s not unusual for people to have multiple careers over a lifetime.  It’s also a time when more and more women and men are crafting careers from multiple sources of employment.  Rather than holding one job, 9 to 5, they may hold more than one part time job or do freelance work, teach classes, consult, and more. The web has created unprecedented employment and business opportunities.  It’s time to carve a career that works for you, rather than other way around.  As for me, I have my sights on a new, multi-faceted career by the time I reach 50 in a few short years. 

So, if my “Inspired” friend continues to feel the need to make a change, I hope she will be open to expanding her horizons and exploring new opportunities. And if that isn’t possible, because not everyone is able to, especially if it means taking a salary cut, a benefits cut, or a longer commute, then I am confident that by staying in the workplace and forging on, we serve as role models for the future, a formidable force, and we will change the future employment landscape for our daughters.  Remember...Sunday may be the beginning of a new week, but today is the beginning of the rest of your life.  How do you want to live it?