This Halloween makes me sad. Every year for so many years there was excited chatter in my house about Halloween costumes that started sometime in September. I always insisted on making things or throwing together facsimiles of popular costumes. And found myself sewing and gluing up until the last moment.

My son was a Winnie-the-Pooh, black bat (as opposed to Batman), Indiana Jones complete with whip that he took to school (ugh!), Davey Crockett, Robin Hood, a pirate (before the Caribbean series), a cowboy with toy guns in his holster (not at school), a werewolf, a vampire (I think) and many of the classics like baseball and football players.

My 3 daughters were variations on witches and the Harry Potter crowd. They were Disney princesses (from dress up outfits passed along from friends) and at least one of the following: mermaid, cowgirl, dancer, ballerina, flapper, clown, stuffed bunny, Dorothy, Pikachu, Red Riding Hood, Tinker Bell, hippie/flower child, ladybug, purple in the rainbow, black cat (2), a puppy named Molly, baby ghost (2), Pooh (2, why waste a great homemade costume?), and pumpkin (2).

The first elementary school my older children attended was Halloween central. The principal loved it and every year would show up in a new and elaborate costume and lead the kids in a Halloween parade out the door and down the street. All the families (who could) would line the sidewalk with little ones in costumes to see their big sibs and their classes. It was delightful.

Then we moved and the schools had new rules but the village allowed trick-or-treating in all the shops and there was a Sunday rag-a-muffin parade as well. So what the little ones missed out on in school, they made up for in the community.

As they hit high school things changed dramatically. They didn’t (and don’t) seem to want my input anymore. The dress-up box clothes are too small and most have been given away. My girls barely find things in my closet that fit them and my shoes are too small. They have turned to store-bought costumes like the women’s devil/angel and a wench-y witch (or was it a witchy-wench?) or have dreamed up things on their own along with friends. 

This weekend I might hear: “Mom can I get…?” and we’ll have to take a ride.  I might get asked to help apply makeup but that is rare now, since they are very adept at doing each other’s stage faces. What happened to being needed? 

I put a few decorations around the house but people cannot easily get to our home without driving so we go elsewhere for fun and leave an honor basket out just in case.

I still dress all in black for the evening, throw on some stage makeup,  a cape or shawl with my velvet black hat and jack-o-lantern pin even though the kids are off with friends either trick-or-treating or hanging out at a  make-shift party. But it’s not the same as going door-to-door with a covey of kids or the neighborhood parties we hosted when they were all little, when a hundred kids would come to my city doorway looking for treats and would get scares thwrown in. All the little ones would start and end at our house where they would have hotdogs and desserts and the parents would gather for hot cider.

Life changes. Memories remain and I know it may all come full circle again.

Meanwhile, let me go dust off my hat, find my pin… and plug in the mock jack-o-lanterns…  Anyone need costume pieces or a little help with their spooky makeup? i might have some time.

(What was the favorite costume you ever made?)