I have a dear friend who went back to work after baby #2 about six months ago.  We were talking about going back to work (which I did today - more on that later) while nursing babies.  The reminiscing about "Bessie," as we call our collective breast pumps, ended with her admitting she fantasized about running over her Pump in Style with her Honda Odyssey.  

After I got over the awesome image of my mild-mannered, sweet, non-violent friend crushing the baby-food-maker, I got to thinking about the love-hate relationship working moms have with their breast pumps.  On the one hand, they are nothing short of a miracle.  The modern pumps make it possible for moms to work full-time professional jobs AND nurse their babies.  On the other hand, they are a loud electric handcuffs.  They are reminders that you are at a desk attached to plastic accessories instead of on your couch nursing your precious infant.  

They also had a layer of transition to your return to work.  There's your pregnant months at work, then your maternity leave, followed by the months you spend part of your day topless and hooked up to tiny bottles.  You don't really go back to your prior self (and do you ever?) until you retire Le Pump.  

As annoying as it is to schlep that "tote bag" (sure thing, Medela, all my tote bags weigh 10 pounds empty) every day, it's worth it. I was able to nurse my daughter until she weaned naturally, despite my working full time.  It really mattered to me to nurse my babies, and the pump has made it possible.  

Now, pumping every day - 3-4 times a day - isn't for everyone.  But if you want to do it, yes, you can!  Don't let working stand in your way.  Here's how:

1. Buy a good double electric pump.  I pick on the Medela Pump in Style in jest - it is the gold standard, and it's worth the $275 or whatever it is these days. 

2. Buy two sets of everything: the "horns," valves, collection bottles.  Otherwise you will spend every night doing dishes. 

3. Buy some wipes to clean up your stuff in between sessions.  You will quit quickly if you have to wash your stuff out in the sink between sessions.  

4. If you don't have an office, talk to your HR dept or manager about a pumping place.  Be creative: you can retrofit many unused spaces.

5. In that same conversation, if you meet resistance, suggest how you can continue to be productive.  You don't need to overshare; just describe how you can make it work within your schedule.

6. If you can make pumping a nice little break, do it.  But if you can't, and you want to check e-mail, write reports, and have conference calls while pumping, spend the $30 on a hands-free bustier.  It. will. change. your. life.  

7. Don't be a crazy woman!  Don't obsess over the number of ounces you get.  You should aim to pump as often as your baby is feeding in your absence.  If you can't make enough by pumping at work, you can pump some at home (morning, night), or you can supplement with formula.  Even if you are bent and determined to have an exclusively breastfed baby, believe me, your baby is better off with a little formula than with a crazed mother.  

8. Keep your eye on the prize.  Your goal is to keep your baby fed while you work. There are lots of ways to accomplish this.  But if you want to keep nursing your baby when you head back to the office, keep the faith.  

Then go home and cuddle that baby.