I don’t intentionally lie to my child. Rewind that. I don’t intentionally lie to my child on a regular basis. I reserve the intentional lying for special occasions like Christmas when lying is the lesser of two evils. My daughter is, at times, an old soul so allowing her to still believe in Santa Claus at age five sounds like a reasonable way of helping her stay a child a little bit longer. (I just read back what I wrote and there’s something warped about admitting that I “reserve intentional lying for special occasions like Christmas, but…I’ll ponder that another day.)

Last night was a case in which I didn’t intentionally lie. I just lied…accidentally. I had put my daughter to bed, but her habit is to come see us for a second round of hugs and kisses five minutes after I leave the room. This was like any other night except that when she came out of her room, it was to ask a question. “Mommy, when I lie in my bed, my pajama pants light up. What is that?” I knew what she was referring to because I had noticed it when I was reading her stories, and just figured that I had bought her pajamas that glow in the dark without knowing it. Common sense won out, though, and I realized that the phenomenon was a result of static electricity. They weren’t glow-in-the-dark pajamas. The light was from mini-sparks caused by static electricity.

So my husband and I told her exactly what it was. She accepted the answer and went merrily on her way, but I was suddenly attacked by this ludicrous notion that if she kept tossing and turning in her bed, she might set herself on fire because of the static electricity. All of those warnings I’d heard about static electricity causing fires at gas stations were ringing in my head. I could have said something much more calming and logical than I did.

Instead, I said, “Lexi, try not to rub your pajama legs together. You might set yourself on fire.” I can’t believe I said that to a five-year-old who (1) takes things literally and (2) has enough imagination for ten adults. Her little eyes got even bigger than they are, and she asked whether it was true. Again, I don’t intentionally lie to my child, but in that moment, I believed it was possible so I said, “It might be true.” She immediately expressed that she never wanted to wear those pajama pants again and changed into leggings.

My husband tried to diffuse the situation and inform her that she was not going to set herself on fire. I was afraid to look at him because I knew he would give me “the look.” The one that said, “Did you just seriously tell your daughter that she could set herself on fire by sleeping in her pajamas?” I felt guilty. I did. So I googled it to confirm that I did not lie to my child. I learned that while static electricity on clothes can be an issue, there has only been one reported incident in which a man set his carpet on fire because his clothes contained 40,000 volts of static electricity. See? I’m not a complete lunatic for thinking it could happen.

I notice that a lot of pajamas have warning labels that refer to their being “anti-flammable.” Can they add a label that says “anti-sparks,” too? That would have saved me a lot of trouble last night.

So when was the last time you lied to your child(ren)-intentionally or unintentionally?