What is a leader anyway? I’ve essentially had that discussion hundreds of times over the past decade with supervisors, managers, front line staff, business thought leaders, learning and development professionals, etc., etc… But I’ve never asked a six year old. Until now.

“Lexi, what do you think makes a good leader?” I didn’t ask this in a rhetorical sense. She has knowledge and experience in this area since “line leaders” have been regular fixtures in all of her schools. In typical Lexi fashion, she said, “Let me think about it.”

That’s a trait of a leader-one who isn’t impulsive and knows when to reflect before answering. I didn’t teach her that. I’m going to borrow that from her. But here is Lexi’s definition of a leader:

Momma, a leader is someone who behaves and obeys the teacher. When the teacher is looking for a line leader, she’s not going to pick the person who is shouting, “Me, me, me!” She’s looking for the child who has behaved that day and obeyed. She’s also going to pick a leader who is quiet because one of the rules of walking in line is, “No talking.” The teacher isn’t going to pick a line leader who is talking because she knows they’ll break the rules and that won’t be good for everyone following behind.”

Ouch. How many times have I broken or bent the rules and still asked to be the leader? I actually like policies and procedures…for other people, but I usually excuse myself from having to follow them. That’s not modeling admirable behavior. Through the eyes of a six-year-old and pretty much everyone else, that’s pretty arrogant of me. But I am aware of that flaw of mine. Just remember that the premise of this blog is my journey towards greater humility.

I was reflecting on leadership this week because I was asked to consider writing leadership articles for the duration of 2012 based on my “expertise.” I almost turned it down. I even asked the question, “Why me?” The last time I officially supervised staff was ten years ago, and it was an abysmal failure on my part. I was a tyrant who placed results over people. It would not surprise me if those four individuals identified me as the worse boss they have ever had. I deserved that title.

But the response to my question was that they were seeking my experience and expertise as a “leader,” not a “supervisor.” Ten years ago, I had the title of a supervisor, but no one would have called me a leader, especially worthy of respect. Today, I know that I’m not entitled to be a “leader” by nature of my education or experience. I am humbled by the lessons I’ve learned in the past decade from mentors and colleagues who have cared enough to invest in my development. I don’t take the responsibility of being a leader lightly and gladly accept the opportunity to share what I have learned about leadership with others.

As I just told Lexi, “I will do my very best to behave, obey and show respect for those in authority. I will seek to be quiet and more reflective versus obnoxious and impulsive. I will also recognize that others are watching me as a role model so I need to be extra careful about what I say and do.” Is that everything, Lexi?

Momma…one more thing. Promise not to be bossy.

Hahaha…now she’s just asking for too much…