Husband and Dad. Husband and Friend. Husband and Badminton Partner. But Husband and Co-worker?? The first ones I know well and am comfortable with, but the latter is a new “AND.” In a few days, my husband and I will be working for the same organization, in the same department, in the same building, next door to each other.

What do you think about that?

When I share this with others, I receive one of two responses.

“Oh boy, I couldn’t work with my spouse! I care about my marriage too much,” or “Oh, how wonderful! Your marriage is going to be so blessed and richer because of it.”

Hmmm…I’m not on either extremes, but I definitely lean towards the second response of believing this is going to be a very positive experience. Initially, when my husband indicated that he was considering applying for the position on our team, I immediately said, “Absolutely NOT! That would be a conflict of interest.” My husband took me at face value and thought nothing more about it. The only problem was that I hadn’t actually asked whether it would be a conflict of interest according to HR. I was referring more to a personal conflict of interest in not wanting to wade into the territory of spouses who work together.

But the issue came up again when a colleague suggested that he apply for the position because his professional experience and personality seemed to be a good fit for the organization and role. Grrr…she had to throw in the “competence” and “fit” card. I was still unsure. For the longest time, my work has been a separate sphere, something that was entirely mine. I felt thrown off balance by the idea of sharing my work with my husband. Because once we blur the lines of work and home, then what happens? Will we make time to talk about anything besides work? Then the questions about our relationship flooded my thoughts. How will we work together in the same office? We get annoyed at each other’s idiosyncrasies at home, but there is no one-other than our daughter Lexi-to observe it. If we annoy each other at work, then other people like bosses and colleagues will be privy to that, and that’s just weird. The other day, we went out to our first team lunch, and my husband chose not to sit next to me to prove that he didn’t need to sit next to me. (Go back and read that again. Just weird, right?)

Once those not-so-pleasant-wifely thoughts played themselves out, then I thought about the benefits. For this position, my husband is extremely qualified. In fact, I can’t think of anyone I would rather have in this role. And when it comes to work, I enjoy being surrounded by highly competent individuals. Normally, I don’t discuss work successes and challenges in detail to my husband because it would mean explaining terminology and people that my husband doesn’t know. But now we will have a shared language and be able to share in the successes and challenges of ministry together. I love that.

And as another colleague pointed out, I am only a four-digit extension away from having tea or lunch brought directly to my desk! But I would never abuse my position as his wife in the workplace that way…

What are your thoughts or experience with working in the same office as your spouse?