I have read many articles and books as well as listened to countless individuals share that money is the number one cause of most marital arguments and divorce.

I beg to differ. In our house, home improvement projects are the greatest source of contention. And, no, it’s not the cost of the projects that often divided us. It’s the “doing” part that gets us every time.

And it ultimately comes down to different communication and personality styles. You can insert any home improvement project, but it typically sounds a little like this:

Me: “Honey, I think we need to repaint our closet. What do you think?”

Hubby: “I never really thought about it.”

Me: “Well, I think it’s pretty crucial, and we need to get to it right away.”

This discussion ends abruptly because I’m already emptying out the closet and piling all of our clothes on the bed, floor, available surface, etc…

Hubby: “Uh, where are we gonna sleep tonight since you just buried the bed under all of our clothes? If we paint it, it’ll need time to dry so…”

Me: “Good point, honey. Let’s go buy the paint and supplies and do it right now so we can have a place to sleep.”

Hubby: “But it’s dinnertime and we haven’t eaten yet. By the time we start the project, it’ll be 10pm.”

Me: “Yep, that’s about right. Let’s head to Home Depot. The longer we stand here talking about it, the longer it’ll take. This isn’t a time for logic. Let’s just get it done.”

Of course, we head to the store and buy what we need. My husband will then get his paint clothes on and just about the time he says he’s ready to get started, I’ve changed my mind and decided to read instead. The moment has passed and I don’t feel like getting started late at night.
Come morning, though, I’ll start painting at 6am because I can’t stand to see the disaster area I’ve made of the rest of the room. Then I’ll ask my hubby for help reaching all the places I can’t…after he has showered and is clean, of course.

So now you understand why home improvement projects are our downfall. By now, you have probably surmised that I have serious issues and drive my husband slightly insane. I am gung-ho and annoying about getting something done. Then the initial excitement wears off and I feel apathetic about the whole thing, and then I get all fired up again and seek to complete the task as though my life depended on it.

My husband has been very patient with me. It used to be that he found it easier to let me just do whatever I wanted, but he is wise and now realizes that I so often don’t know what it is that I want and will change my mind at least a dozen times. So in true complementary style, he listens and then he makes a decision even if it’s a home improvement project he doesn’t care about. He knows it’s my circuitous route of desperately seeking help. That’s why we work well together.

But in preparation for selling our house, I have a list of twenty home improvement projects.

I ask for prayers that we survive this experience…