How would you feel or respond if someone told you that you weren’t a “jeans-type of person?”

Would you

(a) Not care
(b) Just accept it
(c) Obsess about it for days and wonder what the individual meant by this and analyze it to the point where other people are annoyed?

Well, as tempting as choice (a) and (b) are, I, of course opted for (c). I wear business casual on most days, but Friday is an exception when I can dress more casual than business…unless I’m facilitating a workshop or attending a meeting with external customers. This past Friday, I embraced the casual and wore jeans. As I dropped my daughter off at school, the school crossing guard looked at me and said, “You’re just not a jeans-type of person.”

What does that mean? My husband said not to over-think it and that it just meant that because she was used to seeing me in “work” clothes, my wearing jeans was just a novelty to her. I had lunch with a colleague from our Research department that day and she helped me analyze it. Initially, she opted to go with not caring or just accepting it as an inane comment, but I pressed her further to come up with a more in depth analysis.

The crossing guard didn’t say, “Oh, you’re wearing jeans. You never wear jeans. That’s different.” She said, “You’re not a jeans-TYPE- of person.” See? The comment sounds like an analysis of my personality so I asked my friend, “What does it means to be a jeans-type of person.” Her answer?

Jeans indicate relaxed. Jeans indicate comfortable. Jeans indicate someone who goes with the flow. What!?! I’m not a jeans-type person? If I’m not relaxed, comfortable, and a go-with-the-flow gal, then what am I? Uptight, not comfortable, and rigid. She didn’t say it. She didn’t have to. I inherently understand what the comment meant, but didn’t want to face the fact that people don’t see me as relaxed and casual. I’m more often than not uptight and intense.
A couple of years back, I went out to dinner with some friends, and before I even ordered a drink, someone in the group said, “Nhung, you’re not a beer-drinker.”Excuse me? How would you know this? I could very well have a love of hops and ale and delicious fermented drinks. “No, Nhung, you’re more inclined to drink something more sophisticated. You’re not going to order a frou-frou drink either because that’s not you. You’ll probably order something classic, like white wine.” You don’t know me. I can chug back a few. Okay, so I ordered a glass of Riesling. And I really hate beer. I don’t care what people say. That is one taste I would rather not acquire.

I think what bothers me the most about the jeans comment is that “a jeans type of person” is perceived to be more care-free, spontaneous, and fun. I want to be perceived as a care-free, relaxed, spontaneous, and fun kind of person. I know it’s about more than wearing jeans. It’s a way of being and living. But it wouldn’t hurt to invest in a few more pair of jeans to be safe.

So…are you a beer-drinking, jeans-wearing type of person?