Conversations about work/life balance and “having it all” continue to dominate print and online media in the wake of a recent article in The Atlantic. Working mother and Mom Corps CEO Allison O’Kelly suggests searching for balance between work and life implies that the two realms are at odds with one another. In a guest post below, she explores how changing the dynamic to alignment allows women to achieve a supportive, rather than oppositional work/life relationship.

Alignment is Better than Balance: Redefining work/life ideologies by Allison O’Kelly

The debate for professional women on “having it all” in the work/life realm reached renewed fury recently with the publication of Anne-Marie Slaughter’s cover story in The Atlantic, “Why Women Still Can’t Have It All.”  As demonstrated on a national level, the conversations generated by the article were very personal and polarizing. It confirmed once again that work/life issues resonate with a majority of women -- from devout feminists to working moms just testing the waters.

In recent conversations with other working moms at Mom Corps (www.momcorps.com) and with younger professionals without children, a recurring work/life theme is frustration over the lack of proactive ideas and solutions for addressing the perpetual debate. After thoughtful consideration and much reading, I think we are missing a critical piece of the puzzle. Or perhaps we need to alter the context.

It is difficult to summarize the work/life discussion with one view or the other, or one idea, or one solution. We all have different priorities, circumstances and goals, so here are almost as many solutions as there are working parents. By shifting the vernacular away from work/life “balance” (implying the need for equal representation) to “alignment,” we can start to look at the concept from a different perspective -- one that considers how work/life aspects can support each other, rather than compete.

I would never tell women that we can or cannot “have it all.” That is up to each of us individually, and acknowledging that will allow us to support each other in our decisions. I may leave work or log off from home at 4:30 p.m. every day to relieve the nanny, then get back to work at 9 p.m. every night after the kids are in bed and work until midnight. Does that schedule work for everyone? No. But for some, that may be a comfortable timetable that will help them feel “aligned,” because they can address their familial needs and their professional obligations.

If I’m a morning person and want to start work at 5 a.m. from home before the kids wake up, I have generally found a couple of hours of complete focus time. May not be for everyone, but if you are most productive then, power on! Perhaps you job-share during the summer months. Maybe you take on project work from time to time, filling in for executives on leave at different companies.

Consider it from a business perspective. “One size fits all” is rarely a good business strategy. Talented individuals have different work styles, optimal schedules and obligations. If an organization can benefit from their professionals’ most productive, least distracted work, it’s a “win-win” workplace evolution. It takes tenacity, collaboration and time, but if the company is willing to do that they will also benefit from loyalty and longevity.

Mothers are experiencing all sorts of societal pressures today, and new challenges seem to crop up every day. For those who want to find fulfillment in a professional role, we have other demands placed upon us. How we define our work/life alignment should be based solely on the personal situation and preferences of our families. The most important thing is to make an informed decision -- whether you choose to stay at home, work full-time or find a comfortable middle ground -- then commit. It doesn’t mean you can’t change your mind, but be clear on your choice for your sake and that of your family.

Allison O'Kelly is the founder and CEO of Mom Corps (www.momcorps.com), a national flexible staffing firm dedicated to connecting progressive employers with professionals seeking flexible work options.