Three meals and one dinner has been my life for almost eight years. But things are going to change in my house and here is why.

Since my kids were born, I've done everything for them. If they had clothes that needed to be washed, I washed them. If they dropped crumbs on the floor, I swept it up. And if one of my kids didn't like what we were eating for dinner, I would make them a different meal. In fact, on several occasions I prepared each one of my kids something different for dinner. I had a mommy guilty starving kid complex where I didn't want any of my kids to grow up and remember me as the mom who starved them. I didn't want to be thought of as one of those parents who forces their kids to eat something against their will. I can still remember my parents words, "Missy, you either eat what we made for dinner or you can go to bed starving." Sometimes I did go to bed starving. And truthfully it was not a fun feeling.

But now that my kids (ten year old boy, almost nine year old boy/girl twins, and a one year old) are older and I've entered the ludicrious, crazy busy working mom stage, I have a different point of view, which is it's okay for them to starve! Something had to give, and making three meals for dinner was a no brainer to cut out of my bad habits.

So as of this year, I've taken a new leaf. I'm becoming more selfish and standing up for my time, which is actually benefiting my kids. They are becoming more responsible, independent and self-sufficient. Because of my new parenting tactics, my kids are growing up.

Here's what I've changed:

• No longer am I cooking four meals. Hooray! I cook one; and if one of my kids doesn't want to eat it, he or she can make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for themselves. And if they don't want to eat that, they can starve.
• They are responsible for completing their homework. Of course, I'm still available to help them. But I'm not on top of them like I was when they were in kindergarten and first grade. And I'm not reading 30 minutes a day with each of them, giving me an additional hour and a half to do other things.
• If they dirty something like the kitchen counter, they are responsible for cleaning up their mess.
• If they take a toy out, they need to put it away or I take it away.
• They are now responsible for taking the dog for a walk every day.
• They are responsible for feeding the dog.

My parenting life is becoming more manageable. Like me, many mom's do everything for their kids, simply because we can do it faster and better. It's easier to throw a load of laundry in ourselves than to spend the time teaching your child to do it themselves. Something needed to give in my life so I could have more time to do the things I wanted and needed to get done.  For me I needed to rethink my parenting tactics so I could have a sense of family balance. And now I'm getting just that!

Happy Mother's Day,

Melissa

www.melissaproductions.com