Working full-time for Kars for Kids, I don't often get to see my toddler interact with children her age. She's a very outgoing little girl and is usually very friendly, even to strangers.

So Sunday's mishap was a bit of a surprise to me. You might even say a rude awakening.

One of our neighbors was throwing a carnival in her backyard, with the proceeds to be donated to charity. Seemed like a fun enough idea for the afternoon.

But it soured quickly. Baby girl made a beeline for the playhouse in the yard and made it her stronghold. Standing at the door like a sentry, she refused access to any of the other children (until I intervened.)

Worse, there was one girl a few months younger than her, a petite thing, who became A's victim. She pushed her away, took her toys, shoved her and just generally scared the heck out of the poor kid.

Shoot. Now I'm that mother of the uncontrollable kid, the one everyone looks at with some variation of disdain, contempt or pity.

Of course I apologized profusely to the girl's mother, who, after commenting on the deceptively innocent look on my child's face, said, "Does she do this at the babysitter too?"

I didn't know. But I would find out. The Kars4kids day care providers told me that she does bully other kids sometimes. Not enough that I was told about it, but enough that they noticed it.

So it wasn't just her baby brother who was at risk. 

I'm all gung ho about tackling this behavior, talking to experienced parents, reading expert advice, discussing it with my husband. We're working on it. But for now, it's still a work in progress. I still have more questions than answers.

But I've learned one thing for sure. Don't be so quick to judge another parent by their child's behavior. It's so tempting, but so, so unfair. I hope that's a lesson I'll remember next time I see some annoying brat throwing a full-fledged temper tantrum in the pizza shop. After all, that child could be mine.