Are you struggling to get the respect and credit you deserve at work?  It might be your good girl  kicking in.  You don’t have to be like Meryl Streep in the Devil Wears Prada, but every day at work and in life, women do simple verbal and non-verbal behaviors that erode their personal power without realizing it.   

Here are some of the biggest offenders.  Are you guilty of any of them?

1. Don’t look people at people directly when speaking or listening.  Your eyes speak volumes.  Good girls have a tendency to glance at people's eyes and quickly look away.  Instead, when you speak to someone look directly in their eyes and hold that pose.  When listening, keep your eyes fixed on the person and you will influence their interest in you even though you’re silent. 
2. End sentences with a question mark?  Many women bring their voice up at the end of a sentence, making it sound like a question.  It’s as if they want you to affirm that what they’re thinking is ok because they're so unsure of themselves?  Don’t make others wonder if you’re competent to handle things.  Focus on making statements.  Don’t you think? 
3. Play with your hair. You may not even notice that you’re playing with your hair, but such gestures often send the signal that you’re uncertain, feeling intimidated or nervous.  Playing with your hair also has the connotation of being flirtatious and a sign of sexual attraction, which is a major distraction if you want to be taken seriously.
4. Over-explain.  Women tend to over-complain and over-explain.  Time and again competent, intelligent women explain to the Nth degree why she made a decision, including all the background events of who said what, who did what, then what happened, and on and on.  As a result, her stature and power seep out of the room.  You owe the world results, not an explanation.
5. Use trendy expressions such as, “I was like...”  Trendy, popular phrases are fleeting and usually aren’t powerful so use them sparingly.  Swearing may get attention but is generally considered unprofessional, although, what the hell, it can be effective now and then!  If you laughed just now and got the point, it’s because humor is a very powerful communication technique, too.  But, watch out!  Humor can work against you when used to put down others.  
6. Believe appearance shouldn’t matter.  Given today’s more casual workplace, it’s easy to think that your appearance doesn’t matter.  It does.  Ill-fitting, outdated clothes can communicate that you have less energy and are less effective.  Dressing for the position you want exudes confidence and a willingness to take on more responsibility.  And, unfortunately, a Cornell University study shows that being overweight can limit your earning potential.

Get more ideas about how to increase your career confidence in my free Sanity, Confidence & Fun Action Pack which includes the eBooks How to Thrive on Shift & Change for Your Career and What Every Woman Must Know About Office Politics eBooks.  Click here to get your Action Pack now!

About Mary Foley

Get more free resources to increase your career confidence at MaryFoley.com, including your Free Sanity, Confidence & Fun Action Pack with eBooks How to Thrive on Shift & Change for Your Career and What Every Woman Must Know About Office Politics eBooks. Mary inspires women with practical advice to create sanity in your life and confidence in your career – all while having a bit of fun!  She is the author of three books, a popular national speaker, and former co-host of the Girlfriend We Gotta Talk! radio show.  Find out more at http://www.maryfoley.com.