Last night as I was walking upstairs to say goodnight to my three elementary aged kids, my ears caught wind of lots of giggling and whispering. Curious, I tiptoed down the hallway, eager to see what they were up to. I quietly peeked my head around Jake’s bedroom door (he’s my ten year old), finding he and his twin brother and sister taking a whiff of each other’s armpits and laughing with each smell. Jake was holding a deodorant stick in his hand. They were being a kid, pretending to be a mini-adult. Or were they?

My kids are making their own lunches. They’re picking out their clothes for school. They started to wash the dishes by hand. They’ve almost mastered tying their shoelaces. Why they and many of their friends haven’t figured it out yet still blows my mind. And just the other day Jake asked me when he can start lifting weights. Truthfully, I hadn’t a clue, so I told him I’d look into it, which means I’ll be googling the words, “When is the best time for your child to start lifting weights?”

My kids have entered that tween age which marketers have defined as 9 – 12 years old, although some have even included 8 year olds in this age group. My three tweens are like mini-actors, trying to be teenage-like, but still can’t help themselves from being a kid, digging in the dirt and having stick sword fights. They want to wear deodorant and honestly, I think they should. Their sweet little bodies are starting to smell like their daddies after a good workout. My kids also want to watch PG-13 movies, which I’m not a proponent of at their age. I just don’t think they can mentally handle the content in most PG-13 movies. And they want to shave. Ha! You have to have facial hair to do that.

So how do you prepare for this in between, tween age? Here’s what I’m doing:

• I’m preparing myself for that one conversation that most parents dread to have—explaining the birds and the bees—yes, sex. Next year, Jake will be in fifth grade. This is the grade where he will attend an educational class on the female and male body parts, which also includes a discussion on sexual behavior. I plan on sitting down with my kid’s way before the school educates them on the birds and the bees. Creating a family environment of open, honest communication is key for tween and teenage years. This is the start!
• I’m giving them more responsibility by letting them walk our oversized goldendoodle without me, doing the dishes, and making their meals.
•   I’m reinforcing the importance of personal hygiene. No one likes to play with a kid who stinks.
• I’m making them accountable for their choices. And if they make bad choices like punching each other or fibbing, they know they will receive punishment accordingly. Typically our punishment is taking away entertainment devices like Wii, television and their handhelds. We’ve found grounding them in their room hasn’t changed behavior. But losing something they love to do is working like a charm. 
• Creating a family environment of open communication. Talk, talk, and talk with your children! Listen to them and don’t judge them. Some parents believe you can’t be their friend. I think there is a balance between being a parent and being a friend. A good friend looks out for their friends. That is what a parent is doing. Let your kids know that they can still have fun with you. Let them know they can count on you. Not every second of everyday has to be a lecture. Sometimes you just have to put on a smile and let them learn from their mistakes.