You’ve heard through the mommy grapevine that babies can potty train as young as 7 months. But you can’t be there all day to chase your toddler around with her Elmo potty. Is this why your child still isn’t trained? Those infants aren’t actually toilet trained, says Joseph Barone, MD, chief of pediatric urology at Bristol-Myers Squibb Children’s Hospital in New Brunswick, NJ. It’s about a mom watching and reading her baby’s urges and then holding her over the potty. “Kids that young aren’t physically capable to train,” he explains. It requires skills like recognizing the need to go and being able to remove clothing—skills babies don’t have. The ideal age for toilet training, according to Dr. Barone’s research, is between 24 and 32 months (though there’s no real harm in trying earlier). “By then, your toddler can undress herself and control the need to go,” he says. Other readiness cues: staying dry for a few hours, wanting to use the potty and being uncomfortable in wet diapers. If your child doesn’t show any signs by 32 months, start anyway, suggests Dr. Barone, and get other adults (Dad, caregivers, grandparents) involved in the process. Consistency is key, and a reward system can’t hurt—especially for the older resistant kid. So break out the stickers, and soon your toddler will be swapping damp diapers for dry undies.

Training Tips

Take Dr. Joseph Barone’s advice to help your tot ditch the diapers.

Introduce underwear at home so she can feel the discomfort when it’s wet and may instead opt for the toilet.

Go bare bottom. Your child will be more likely to use the potty when there’s nothing to catch her waste.

Use media. Potty-training videos and books demonstrate using the potty in a kid-friendly way and offer role models to follow.