Decking the halls, shopping the malls, fielding the mother-in-law calls. Is it any wonder your goodwill toward mankind is a little lacking? To help you focus on the happiness of the holidays, Carol Kauffman, PhD, director of the Institute of Coaching at Harvard Medical School, offers these stress-relieving strategies.

Invest in experiences. If, like most people, you’ve had to tighten your budget, take the focus off gifts. Instead, give the
gift of a special family outing you know your crew will enjoy.

Breathe from your belly. When you’re stressed, you tend to take short, shallow breaths that cue your adrenal system to
tense up even more. The next time you’re anxious, belly breathe, which will help you get more oxygen and let your adrenal system relax. If you feel your belly expand as you take in air (while your chest stays relatively still), you’re doing it right.

Let go of grudges. If there’s a family member you know will stress you out this season, zero in on anything she’s done that was kind and focus on that instead of anger.