With all aspects of her life deeply rooted in family, Gina Neely knows the secret to making it all work. “If there’s one thing I would stress,” Gina says, “it’s that you must take time for yourself no matter what. We have to stop feeling so guilty about that.” And she’s right. When we caught up with her, she was in Memphis playing catch-up after being knee deep into the second season taping of “Down Home With The Neelys,” which she stars in with her husband Pat. But how does this busy mother of two daughters have time when she’s on the highest rated show on the Food Network? 

“I try to create boundaries.” Gina says. With Spenser, 19, away at school and Shelbi, 13, at home, Gina realized that time is sacred and nothing should come in the way of family. “Shelbi came to the set after school…and she asked, ‘Ma, do I have to stay?’ I told her that she never has to stay. I don’t want my life to become their life. It’s so important—just because you choose to do something everybody else doesn’t have to. Be cognizant of what they need and they want…and compromise. Sometimes we wear so many hats that all of them blend together, but you’ve got to remember when you enter a certain role or environment, you have to take off the other hat. It’s not easy, but the more we practice it and do it the more it becomes like second nature. So now I don’t feel so overwhelmed. If I get tired, I simply say it, ‘I’m tired, mommy needs a minute.’ And I’ll go in my room and take a hot bath or whatever it is that I need to do. Nobody can read our minds; that’s for sure. It's important to let that child know. They see us as super parents, but we are human and we make mistakes, we make bad choices, so let them know that mommy made a bad choice and I’ll apologize for it and move on. It helps the child be more comfortable in acknowledging their choices, and lessons, and moving on past them,” she shares.

A typical day for Gina starts at 7:30am. She and Pat drop Shelbi off at school and head to the studio for hair and makeup. They tape all day, except for their lunch break, and then head home where their thirteen-year-old sometimes makes dinner—when she’s not at cheerleading practice. “She’s a different 13-year-old,” Gina realizes and points out that her life may seem easy on TV, but it isn’t. “It’s a blessing though to be able to do what I do,” she says.

She wasn’t always a TV personality. Prior to her superstardom, Gina was a branch manager at a bank. When the family would get ready to plan a vacation together, it was Gina’s schedule that didn’t allow the flexibility. “[I couldn’t] even go to the schools and be in the PTSA, so we decided that I would quit my job and work in Pat’s family business so I could have more flexibility,” she says. “And people said ‘Girl, don’t work with your husband, don’t do it!’ I worked at Wendy’s when I was a young girl and got fired so I never saw myself working in a restaurant. It’s amazing, when I look back now and compare it. I took a chance and kept the faith that everything would be OK and it’s been wonderful for my daughters, for my family, and my marriage. So, a plus all around.”

The family business happens to be centered around some of the best barbeque in the country. And it all started back in 1988 when the four Neely brothers got a loan from their grandmother, who put a lien against her house, to start a barbeque restaurant in Memphis, Tennessee. They were soon able to not only pay grandma back, but see the business flourish. “They had that entrepreneurial type spirit,” Gina tells us. “They worked at their uncle’s place, but it’s different when you come in and do your own thing. They have tenacity and willpower—they took a little something and built it into this phenomenal company. We just celebrated our 20 year anniversary.”

The Transition Into Something Bigger Their show, “Down Home With The Neelys,” all started when one of their restaurants was going to be featured on “Road Tasted.” “We have three stores—two in Memphis and one in Nashville, and we thought they were going to come to one the Memphis stores. We called Tony, my brother-in-law who runs that store [in Nashville], and he was already scheduled for a vacation, so we’re like ‘oh, we’ve got to drive up there.’ So we changed our schedule and got ready to take a road trip—only three hours, not bad—but wouldn’t you know there was an accident on the interstate and we sat in traffic for six hours waiting!” Gina laughs. The story doesn’t end there. They made it to the taping and while there, met with the show’s hosts, Bobby and Jamie Deen (Paula Deen’s sons). “A producer was watching us the whole time, Gina says. “I was cracking on Jamie—I wasn’t acting starstruck and his wife was pregnant at the time so I was like ‘are you taking care of her?’ just kind of jiving, and he’s watching the whole time and thought ‘wow, they have something.’ It just goes to show you never know when someone is watching you when you are just being yourself.”

Gina got those “I’ll call you” words from that producer, and thought he would never call—but he did. She wasn’t so sure about life in front of the camera at first, but was invited out to a taping of southern food queen Paula Deen’s show, “Paula’s Home Cooking.” Paula took the time to talk to Gina about her worries. “She said, ‘Gina you know sometimes God has a plan for you that you don’t even know about. You have to be open to embracing it and I know you are scared, but if you could see what I see, you will be fine.’” Gina says. “And that meant a lot to me coming from her. I would have never thought of myself being on TV—never—still! People say to me, oh you’re a superstar. I say, what’s a superstar? I am still doing laundry, still cleaning...when does the super come in?”

Common Goals When we asked Gina to talk about what it’s like to work with her husband, she replies, “Mmm hmmm!” This couple truly knows how to make it work. “He was in business for about ten years before I came onboard,” she shares. But one of the advantages was that she came from corporate America and could offer a new perspective. “I think now that we work together, we are more sympathetic toward each other,” she says. “If he’s had a bad day, I already know that because I am right there with him in the trenches having it, so it gives us that insight that we normally wouldn’t have if we worked in separate places. That was one of the plus sides.”

So what’s on the minus side? Gina says, “Oh honey, when you are having a bad day or having that little husband and wife spat…but I tell you what’s funny about that is, we don’t have spats like we used to. I don’t know if it’s just a matter of seeing things in a different light,” she says. The couple has a great ability to see both sides of the coin if there is a disagreement. She expands, “It’s helped a lot in that we see what we are fighting about is not as important as we think it is—you think it’s a hot topic when you are into it, but the reality of it kind of brings you back around.”

The common goal they work toward together keeps the relationship hotter than the barbeque they cook up. “I think when you love a person so much, and my husband has such a big heart and is so loyal and so supportive, how can I not love what he does?” she says. “It’s everything I believed in anyway so it was a natural progression for me. I wanted to work with the company and I’m very customer service oriented and that’s what I was able to bring to the table, plus my sales background—it just blended and it worked great. Now my husband says, ‘I can’t imagine how we got along without you.’ And that’s really nice because everybody wants to be known for their value and what they bring to the table—it’s important for me to make a difference…in the bottom line, not just what you saw in the figures. It was a family business and it was important to stand toe-to-toe and earn my respect, and I got that.”

Big Achievers “You’re talking to a girl that believes in girl power and how women hold up the world,” Gina tells us. On women, she adds, “What would the world do without us?” She dedicated a show to the ladies who do it all, and works with charities and organizations devoted to great issues. It all adds to the measure of the Neely’s success. “Having the longevity of the business and seeing the difference in the numbers through the years…being recognized more, being invited to barbeque for the Ambassador, the little things, it’s great to be recognized by your peers,” she says of the family earning their achievements. Pat also won Restaurateur of the Year last year. “The good thing about us is that we always say that we could not have done this without each other or the help of our great team around us. Everybody contributes to the success…even the kids.”

And their girls chip in, too. “Shelbi works now on Saturdays, Spenser works in the summers—they get a taste of it. But us being on TV doesn’t faze them. We always talk to them about working hard and applying yourself.”

Raised in a single-parent home where her mom worked to support them and her great grandmother cared for her, Gina also learned early on to value community. “I grew up on a street with a lot of old people and they didn’t work, so all I would do is go from neighbor to neighbor—they were always cooking and always shooting some wisdom,” she says. “And I remember they used to call me Polly Parrot because all the information I got, when my mom got home, I would tell her about everyone’s business,” she laughs. “To me, that was my lesson. A lot of the youths today don’t have that kind of old wisdom around them, or we don’t take the time to share it. If we slowed down enough to sit back and respect what our elders have to contribute—we don’t do that enough. It was the best thing for me.”

Ultimately, though, this Tennessee native is all about family. “Family is so much more important that any million dollar acquisition that you could have,” she says. “I know Justin brought sexy back,” she says, “but we’re trying to bring family back!”

Gina’s Extras

What’s in your handbag? Louis Vuitton wallet, Eucerin, MAC lip gloss, gummy lifesavers—for the sugar kick.

Favorite makeup? MAC Revealing lip gloss.

Beauty secret? Take your makeup off at night!

Fashion secret? Wear something cute and fun. A great shoe sale is like a sunny day to me.

Stress reliever? Reading.

Dream purchase? A Porsche in white.

Favorite music? John Legend, Jill Scott, Erykah Badu, Maxwell, Amy Winehouse….

Check out “Down Home With The Neelys” on the Food Network