Talk to Her? or Him

By Katherine Lee

Savvy businesswomen know the importance of networking at conferences, meetings, and other professional functions. But according to Susan RoAne, author of How to Create Your Own Luck, a willingness and ability to strike up a conversation with a fellow passenger at an airport or a stranger while waiting for an elevator are chief among several distinguishing traits that set successful people apart.

"When you talk to someone you don't know about little things, you find things in common and develop a connection," says RoAne. "That's when you may learn about a job or other business opportunity." People who seem "lucky" in business and in life also exhibit an openness to possibilities, says RoAne. "Being closed works great in poker, but unless you let people know what you're interested in, they can't possibly offer you leads, information, support, or contacts.

Other traits include a willingness to ask for or offer help, and being able to make gracious, timely exits without burning bridges." Successful people have a network in place before they need it, adds RoAne. "That's what networking is—asking for and offering help," she says. "If it's someone who works for you, say 'I think it would be very helpful if the team had x from you.' From peers, say, 'You're so good at this; I'd love to know how you'd handle it." The idea is to make people feel important and appreciated. "Build up a favor bank," says RoAne. "Don't be afraid to say, 'If I've ever given you a lead or advice, here's how you can help me. Be generous to others and they will give back to you."